Now Edith was an artist. A soft, gentle, creative person. If you can call a little Dutch girl who was raised in South Africa and married a biker hood soft and gentle. Being artistic, Edi was not good with mechanical things. Practicality eluded her. The abstract and colours were her thing. Making something out of nothing wasn't difficult for her. But trying to deal with something you couldn't change or mold, now that really left her challenged. Sort of like her men. She did like a project.
Now the
Nauticat had a new dingy this year. A young dingy fresh from the showroom, a high spirited dingy that
hadn't been properly broken in. A
thoroughbred, born to move. Light(barely100 lbs) and with a highly tuned 18 hp motor. Nothing to
trifle with. Not for the faint of heart. Skittish at speeds and raring to go. One that needed a tight rein to keep under control.
Now Edi had driven the previous dingy from the
Nauticat. A broken in , worn out old dingy held together with contact cement and old patches. Old, overweight, and sluggish, a worn out old war horse destined for the glue recycle factory. She had also driven other dingies and was an accomplished
Kayaker. But
kayaks and
thoroughbred dingies are a different fish, sort of like parrot fish and
barracudas. And this one could bite.
One day in the crowded harbour at the Isles
de Saintes Dave and Edi were loading the dingy to go ashore and fetch Dave and Linda, who were sightseeing. Edi got in the dingy first which was unusual. And she untied it which was strange because she wasn't good with knots or cleats, having not mastered the art of tying a cleat. And before
david could get into the dingy, she had let go of the
Nauticat and drifted a few feet away from the boat. Attempts to throw the bow line to David failed. The dingy oars were
attached with
Velcro straps and she had difficulty undoing them so gave up.
That's when Captain Dave made his first big mistake. "just start the motor and motor back to the boat. Its only 10 feet" Captain Dave, you are an idiot.
So Edi turned around and grabbed the starting rope, and being a
strong stubborn Dutch girl, gave it a pull. Now the dingy had been tied up all night, just chaffing at the painter. It needed exercise. Wanted to kick up its heels and run wild.So it started on the first pull and
emitted a low rumble of purring cylinders, just waiting for a little gas to let loose.
Now instead of sitting down properly and and getting a good firm grip on the dingy and showing him who is boss, Edi put the motor in gear while facing backwards at the motor and still standing. Sensing a
weakness, the dingy was ready.
And using all her Dutch girl
subtleness and
strength ( and she is strong) Edi gave the throttle a twist. A big twist. Full wrist movement. High torque. And
that's what that high strung dingy had
been waiting for. It through up its bow high in the air and leaped forward almost out of the water. A prop walk to start off and it was gone. Edi got thrown into the back of the dingy but still retained a grip on the throttle. She cranked it hard left and that saved her momentarily. the dingy spun hard right and started to pirouette. It found a bit of open space between the boats and did the spinning buck to try and rid itself of Edi. But she is strong and hung on. Its amazing what fear will do for you.
And Captain Davy, fearing for the safety of his new dingy, stood on the back of the
Nauticat and yelled
helpful instructions to Edi. "Turn the throttle" he kept yelling repeatedly. A total hush fell over the anchorage. Sailors dropped the work and watched. First mates dropped their cleaning rags and watched. Other dingies, being driven more sedately, took cover behind boats. But still the dingy kept leaping and spinning.
Captain Davey was frantic with worry about his new dingy. Would she damage it? Would she flip it over and drown it? Would she break its spirit? "Don't hurt the dingy" he screamed. But being a stubborn Dutch girl, Edi wasn't listening to Captain Davey. So he upped the instruction level with a more precise' "Turn the
F%#&*@g throttle " as loud as he could. Because we all know that loud yelling works. Its a Captain thing and we are good at it.
But with a last ditch effort, Edi straightened up the motor. With the reins let loose, the dingy reared on its motor, reached its bow to the sky and took off at high speed right towards a
beautiful dark hulled J Boat. It was ready to try
to leap over the deck. Edi was having nothing to do with dingy steeple chase antics so she slammed the motor hard left and the dingy spun again, trying to throw her out. but by that time she was lying in the bottom of the dingy with only her head showing. and
wasn't moving. the dingy spun a couple of more times and then she straightened out the motor again and it reared and took off as
Captain Davey screamed "
don't hurt the dingy. Turn the
f#%$&*@G thing off!" Edi recovered enough to grab the kill switch (and we all know she wanted to kill the dingy by now), and pulled with all her Dutch might. And the dingy died right there in the harbour. It came to a complete stop, totally exhausted and docile. It lay there dead in the water with Edi melted in the bottom of the dingy, just her head showing.
" Is the dingy all right?" a concerned and sensitive Captain Davey yelled. "I'll
swim out and get you. Look after the dingy till i get there." And as Captain Davey prepared to rescue his precious dingy, Simon, A fellow Canadian from Sidney and also a member of the Canadian Coast Guard, just passing through the Caribbean and looking for good
deeds to do, motored out and came to Edith rescue. He grabbed the painter and proceeded to tow the dingy at Slow speed back to the
Nauticat where Captain Davey was still frantic with worry should any harm have befallen his new dingy. handing Davey the painter he said " Its time for Dingy 101 lessons."
Thankfully the dingy was all right and no damage had been done. Its spirit wasn't broken. Once the kill switch was replaced it was just like new and ready to go again.
But Edi was a different story. Did she ever overcome her fear of the dingy? Did she ever take the
throtte back in her strong hands and show him who is boss. Did she get back in the seat and face her wildest fears? Did she tame that wild and spirited dingy?
Alas she did not. from there on in she never got in the dingy alone or first and never touched the motor. And she
always packed a rat tailed comb with her whenever she had to go ashore, just in case the dingy got frisky again. Because she hated that dingy from then on and would have been very happy to leap on one of the tubes and bury that comb repeatedly in the tubes until they became soft and empty.
And the moral of this story? Like all good Captains this reinforced Captain Davey's notion that screaming loud instructions mixed with the appropriate profanity really works.
Unfortunately there are no pictures of this episode
Update (the last)
Edi left the Nauticat (after three months of coexisting with that dastardly dingy) and returned to her home on lovely Vancouver Island. But Trap Line Edi had been doing her homework and she has hooked up with a nice gentleman with a new and luxureous 49 ft Hunter sailboat and she has been cruising around the Gulf Islands and having a good time. She is planning to set sail with him in 2009 for a trip down the coast to South America and possibly around the horn.
Good luck Edi and i hope the new boat has a large and sedate dingy with a GPS guided autopilot. The Nauticat will miss you.
